Looks like instagram worked! I didn't know you could send photos here.
I have a lot of workarounds for the PDA thing. Sometimes I'll say I'm going out to work on one of these three things, would someone like to join me? and that helps take the pressure off one thing, so I'm more able to be consistent. Asking someone else to start works well. The workarounds are why I like to either do my own projects and let other people drop in as they see me doing things and feel like helping, or let other people do their projects and wander by and ask if they need a hand when I see them working. It takes a lot less energy than navigating around the demand avoidance.
Yes, I basically parse statements like that as "I'll have some role in this, seek explanation". I'm very used to people using a couple phrases which they think clearly mean something, but that many different people would read differently, so I know to seek clarification (see also: "we're monogamous" or "I'm poly").
I'm definitely feeling the need for an online forum-type medium for these conversations. We all get excited and talk a lot, and that's not the way to pin down a set of things as a greed and remembered.
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I have a lot of workarounds for the PDA thing. Sometimes I'll say I'm going out to work on one of these three things, would someone like to join me? and that helps take the pressure off one thing, so I'm more able to be consistent. Asking someone else to start works well. The workarounds are why I like to either do my own projects and let other people drop in as they see me doing things and feel like helping, or let other people do their projects and wander by and ask if they need a hand when I see them working. It takes a lot less energy than navigating around the demand avoidance.
Yes, I basically parse statements like that as "I'll have some role in this, seek explanation". I'm very used to people using a couple phrases which they think clearly mean something, but that many different people would read differently, so I know to seek clarification (see also: "we're monogamous" or "I'm poly").
I'm definitely feeling the need for an online forum-type medium for these conversations. We all get excited and talk a lot, and that's not the way to pin down a set of things as a greed and remembered.