Daily: Bottom

[greenstorm]

When I find myself asking, again and again, what is the least I can accept in a relationship styled like this, that's a sign.

When I find myself trying to make myself as small and quiet as I can without losing myself completely, that's a sign.

When I'm worried or upset about something but don't believe bringing it up can help, that's a problem.

I want people to delight in my mind. I want them to delight in my emotional range and amplitude. I want them to respect and value my skills.

I want the response to discomfort to be opening up the windows and letting light in, not locking me out.

I want to feel like a team, not like an enemy.

I want to share values with someone: each of us has a part in making the world a better place, the world itself can provide us with joy through the patterns in it, intimacy and connection are skills worth cultivating, living well is a skill that requires cultivating, people make meaning through their choices and that meaning is an important thing to make.

I want to be around people who not only understand when I'm making a joke, but who maybe smile or laugh at it.

I want partners who reach out for me first sometimes, who tell me what's on their minds, who can open their hearts.

I don't want this.