Another weekend, another meeting
Apr. 24th, 2022 11:33 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
greenstormSo, a budget turns out to be a way of communicating about what-ifs and whens.
I think that was a really good talk. The budget with numbers in it was the structure I needed to be able to communicate, "what happens when this is this number? What can we do to change this other number?" and they were able to meet me there. We also got to an emotionally honest place for I think all of us, at least E and I, which is where we need to begin I think.
I had done a very rough budget using their expense numbers, put it through a year, and then added some scenarios. We were then able to talk through some scenarios and see where different ones got us.
They went away to input a couple different sets of numbers overnight (what happens if we don't build in buffers, what are some reasonable income assumptions, things like that). Then we'll talk again today.
I definitely have this cycle of feeling reassured when we talk, then finding something else that needs work within a couple days. I guess it's the difference between short-term goals (get our expenses on paper, discuss X) and the longer-term goal (have a general plan for finances for the next two years, decide on dates and fencing locations)
Incidentally, E came up with a really great fencing plan based somewhat on my sketches that I sent over and my input. It bounced back and forth a little and now is probably settled, and then she clearly asked me to give her an ordered list of priorities around perimiter fencing, clearing, internal fencing, etc. I am very reassured and feeling comfortable on that front. <3
We don't fight, we do get where we're going, we seem to be willing to open up about stuff, it's just going to take time to develop a communal shorthand I think.
Also I feel like the community needs a name. Apocalypse Insurance is the farm, Cor Viriditas (sigh, I was hoping it would be Cor Viridis, figures) is the land (I think for E it's Refuge), but the group of us is as yet unnamed. A has us on a fb chat as "The Sayward three" which I believe needs more vision.
I think that was a really good talk. The budget with numbers in it was the structure I needed to be able to communicate, "what happens when this is this number? What can we do to change this other number?" and they were able to meet me there. We also got to an emotionally honest place for I think all of us, at least E and I, which is where we need to begin I think.
I had done a very rough budget using their expense numbers, put it through a year, and then added some scenarios. We were then able to talk through some scenarios and see where different ones got us.
They went away to input a couple different sets of numbers overnight (what happens if we don't build in buffers, what are some reasonable income assumptions, things like that). Then we'll talk again today.
I definitely have this cycle of feeling reassured when we talk, then finding something else that needs work within a couple days. I guess it's the difference between short-term goals (get our expenses on paper, discuss X) and the longer-term goal (have a general plan for finances for the next two years, decide on dates and fencing locations)
Incidentally, E came up with a really great fencing plan based somewhat on my sketches that I sent over and my input. It bounced back and forth a little and now is probably settled, and then she clearly asked me to give her an ordered list of priorities around perimiter fencing, clearing, internal fencing, etc. I am very reassured and feeling comfortable on that front. <3
We don't fight, we do get where we're going, we seem to be willing to open up about stuff, it's just going to take time to develop a communal shorthand I think.
Also I feel like the community needs a name. Apocalypse Insurance is the farm, Cor Viriditas (sigh, I was hoping it would be Cor Viridis, figures) is the land (I think for E it's Refuge), but the group of us is as yet unnamed. A has us on a fb chat as "The Sayward three" which I believe needs more vision.
no subject
Date: 2022-04-26 09:49 pm (UTC)We both seem to think in stories, it's one of the lovely parts of this communication.
no subject
Date: 2022-04-26 11:30 pm (UTC)the process is "we talk this out, no matter what it is," and the structure of that reverts to consensus process as needed when tensions run high.
we as a whole did not talk it out with alan, because i as an individual was unable to do so. i had reached the point that i did not even want to try, i just wanted to leave. and i said, i will leave, or he can leave, and it will break my heart if i leave but i will do it because i cannot live like this anymore. and tristan said, "well, there's no contest in my mind. if it's him or you, i choose you. he hasn't even been here really for the last 7 years and you've been here every day. and that's just one part of it." he has said over and over, "i cannot imagine SR without you." and that means the world. and then, y'know, he did the real-world work to back that up - he co-signed the home loan with me that made the whole thing possible.