I've Been Veto'd!

[greenstorm]

Yay! I've now been Officially Veto'd. Polyfolk will know what I mean.

To everyone else: when existing couples/groups decide to 'open' their relationships, sometimes they come to an agreement where they agree to end their relationships at any time on their partner's say-so. Sometimes this is time-limited (in the first six months of any relationship, I can get you to break it off with someone) and sometimes it's not. So (generally with a lot of thought and reasoning, because it's often very sad for the partner to end a relationship) they can say: hey honey, I want you to stop dating Bob, and it happens. Sometimes they need to give a reason, sometimes they don't, as the individual agreements go. That agreement is, in poly jargon, 'veto power'.

That's definitely another first to add to the list.

No, I'm not to be told the reasoning behind it, but as the Juggler says: they don't need to give reasons to each other for it.

Comments

[http://users.livejournal.com/_locke/]

Wow, that's crappy. Veto sucks.

Still, all the more reason not to be involved, hrm?

[greenstorm.livejournal.com]

I'm still kind of amused. It went from 'a break' to 'a veto' during a period where I had no contact with either of them. It makes me feel sort of evil, like I'm scary and threatening even when I'm off in the suburbs without exchanging a word with anyone.

That and someone said my haircut 'made me look scary, it emphasises my facial features too much'.

It'll wear off, I'm sure, but I totally feel like I have this hoodlum rep.

[lazarus7.livejournal.com]

wow ...
that is the way things go though, I guess.

Sounds like you are taking it well, which is good. You seem to have a good crew of friends in the city too so I am certain you will survive.

BTW, using Bob as your example name amuses me for reasons that your vetoers might understand (if they read these comments that is).

[http://users.livejournal.com/_locke/]

Hoodlum? That's pretty bizarre. I think you should make sure you aren't taking too much on yourself here. You are a pretty laid back person and generally not at all evil (except for your evil anti-anime & magic tendancies ;)

[greenstorm.livejournal.com]

That's the way I look at myself, but not everyone sees me by my own perspective. That's the amusing part, the bit that comes out and says: oh, look, reality! Haha! I am both a normal person and a terrible threat!

Veto Power

[koppermoon.livejournal.com]

I know it has its uses, but I can't say I'm comfortable with it. I think of only in in "extreme circumstances", e.g., your SO just started dating a psychopath...

Do you wanna friend me?

[estrellada.livejournal.com]

Hey, being a threat is kind of fun.

Tillie, who just told ANOTHER person how to find their cervix.

Re: Veto Power

[estrellada.livejournal.com]

yeah, I think veto with LOTS of discussion and EARLY on in things and for 'good reasons' is ok.
As things go further along, it would take ALOT more to make me ok with the 'dump them' edict.

Re: Veto Power

[koppermoon.livejournal.com]

I don't see it working without a lot on wrenching pain on all sides, once a relationship has been established.

[greenstorm.livejournal.com]

"...Tillie... I can't find my cervix... help me!"

Being an actual threat is not so fun fun, but I know that in this situation the actual problem lies elsewhere (obviously, as if the problem gets worse when I disappear it can't have too much to do with me).

[greenstorm.livejournal.com]

I take it poorly from time to time, but I have yet to get over the amusement/shock of it. I also need to wait till a friend I can cry with is around, cause otherwise it's too sad to handle.

You sound like you're having good bits too. Glad to hear that.

Next time, I will use Dave?

Re: Veto Power

[greenstorm.livejournal.com]

Sure.

Re: Veto Power

[greenstorm.livejournal.com]

Yeah.

Re: Veto Power

[greenstorm.livejournal.com]

...but then, "I'll endure wrenching pain for you, baby," has always been 'romantic' hasn't it?

[lazarus7.livejournal.com]

you could use Dave ... but Bob is funnier. I will explain sometime if I see your IRL.

[lazarus7.livejournal.com]

-your +you

Re: Veto Power

[rainbowk.livejournal.com]

This is one of those things I would have great discomfort ever using... who am I to say who someone else can be involved with, who they're attracted to, who they want to spend their time with... People bring their own complications into every relationship, and that's part of the expansion of relationships, with self and others... we learn what we need to learn out of the situations given to us.

But then, I'm feeling philosophical this morning...

wrenching pain

[koppermoon.livejournal.com]

Been there, done that, finally getting it through my head that it's not essentially romantic.

I'm enjoying being happy.