The Lure Of Normal

[greenstorm]

Things are abruptly kind-of normalising.

The SO and I talked a bunch. It's scary to write this down, because writing this down is committing, but it's about time I did this. We've agreed that it's time for me to get off my ass and get a job (I hate job search). We move in together in Vancouver ASAP, and I commit to doing useful stuff every day towards at least one of those goals.

We may or may not decide to go our seperate ways after trying out that new configuration.

It's, yes, about time -- past time, whichever, I really don't need anyone to tell me that. I need to stop thinking of this as impossible, I need to break it down into little daily tasks that I can do -- and then, what I didn't do last time, I need to be proud of doing the little daily tasks -- even if they result in failure over and over and over again, because they will.

If I do keep at it they will pay off eventually, right?

So, I'm feeling better now. Before it was an insurmountable conflict with the SO, now there are (albeit hard) things that I can actually do.

He really is a catalyst to bring out the most determined, the best, and the most normal in me.

Potted up my Buddhist Pine and got three out of the deal -- the nursery had lumped a bunch together. Repotted the spider plant, watered the garden but good. Abe Darby is flowering, a really pink bloom compared to those earlier in the year.

Need to feed myself. Need to find the number of the Abby employment center and call them to see if they have something similar in Vancouver.

Need to dig out old resume, retarget it for nurseries; they'll be my first line of attack even if this is a crappy season for it.

I'm going to be silly and eccentric and stick a picture or two of my garden in there with the resume, unless someone has a really good reason not to out there. The kind of place that will be impressed by that is the kind of place I want to work.

Comments

[darthmaus.livejournal.com]

*phew* Glad to hear it. Like, really really a lot.

I think I'm learning that maybe the best approach to dealing with potential upheaval is to just not react for a couple of days, and assume that it will reverse itself -- what do you think? ;-)

Btw, I'm really good at resumes, cover letters, etc (if I may toot my own horn -- HONK!) and happy to give advice if asked. And if you don't ask, I'll stay out of the way ;-)

[greenstorm.livejournal.com]

It hasn't actually reversed itself. We've just decided to take it one step at a time and see how each step works out. In general, 'core thing that will happen' sounds pretty catastrophic, but is massaged when two reasonable people sit down and work out the details. It's still the same thing probably happening.

I'll ask for your advice with that, definitely -- I don't have much to work with, though. :(