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greenstormAt least the comfortable happy periods are coming more frequently now. I'm actually working through issues at a decent speed again, something that's been missing from my life for... months? years? I can't remember. The group sex thing is on its way to being resolved. I've put crutches in and don't anticipate needing them up for more than a couple of weeks and in the meantime I'm making good progress. (Curious, aren't you? I said the s-word)
The stuff that's bothering me lately isn't actually my own stuff, exactly. This is polyamoury(polyamory for you in the US) at its finest: I'm worried a bit about the relationship between my boyfriend and my girlfriend. I'm at my best when I'm having a bit of a complex problem that related to my own unconscious stuff and can dive in, light up, simplify, and fix. I'm at my worst when I need to sit and watch other people grind gears, talk past each other, just not mesh perfectly. It's hard for me in any combination (I just love saying this sort of stuff): hard when my girlfriend and my boyfriend-who-is-her-husband are having issues, hard when my girlfriend and my SO are having issues, and no doubt it would be hard for me if my boyfriend and the SO were having issues.
Incidentally, the word 'boyfriend' is completely amusing -- makes me feel like I'm in fifth grade, which is why I'm using it. Gigglyish, despite the undercurrent of seriousness in what I'm writing.
I'm home at the Abby apartment tonight, then I'm at the Vancouver apartment in the morning while the SO sleeps and me and TOW clean, then who knows? This weekend feels a lot more fluid than the ones before.
It's still hard for me to believe that I'm not imposing on TOW and the Juggler by staying there so much. This is the second full-ish week I've spent there this month. I can't believe they actually -want- me.
It's a bit of a struggle to keep going in this rain. I want to curl up in front of the fire with a book and not go anywhere, but I really don't have that option. Once you get outside it's not so bad, actually, and the city looks and smells and sounds like it's supposed to again, grey and wet, which sounds a lot worse than it actually is.
It's great running weather, and how many times have I said I'll start running again? Enough. I'll tell you when I do, and stop talking about it until then.
I've read a couple of Neil Postman books now, speaking of books. I feel so sorry for him. He sounds so disappointed that his ideas haven't been taken and embraced wholesale, and in fact so disappointed and defeated about America in general. The books kind of grow increasingly more hurt...
I've bought myself some halloween candy to eat already. Yay, food!
And my throat is definitely sore. The Juggler coughed, TOW and the SO sniffled, I'm just sore/swollen/tender with no outward display. Pah.
Now, to sleep if I can, other stuff sooner or later than that. Oh! With the rain I'm sleeping through the night again (unless I need to wake up and turn the light off over the Juggler on the couch at 5am because he can't sleep lying down due to the cough. Or find a bedmate who hasn't wandered in to sleep by 4am. But I -do- get back to sleep quickly. Sigh).
This has been a totally random entry. Be well, take care, and good night.
The stuff that's bothering me lately isn't actually my own stuff, exactly. This is polyamoury(polyamory for you in the US) at its finest: I'm worried a bit about the relationship between my boyfriend and my girlfriend. I'm at my best when I'm having a bit of a complex problem that related to my own unconscious stuff and can dive in, light up, simplify, and fix. I'm at my worst when I need to sit and watch other people grind gears, talk past each other, just not mesh perfectly. It's hard for me in any combination (I just love saying this sort of stuff): hard when my girlfriend and my boyfriend-who-is-her-husband are having issues, hard when my girlfriend and my SO are having issues, and no doubt it would be hard for me if my boyfriend and the SO were having issues.
Incidentally, the word 'boyfriend' is completely amusing -- makes me feel like I'm in fifth grade, which is why I'm using it. Gigglyish, despite the undercurrent of seriousness in what I'm writing.
I'm home at the Abby apartment tonight, then I'm at the Vancouver apartment in the morning while the SO sleeps and me and TOW clean, then who knows? This weekend feels a lot more fluid than the ones before.
It's still hard for me to believe that I'm not imposing on TOW and the Juggler by staying there so much. This is the second full-ish week I've spent there this month. I can't believe they actually -want- me.
It's a bit of a struggle to keep going in this rain. I want to curl up in front of the fire with a book and not go anywhere, but I really don't have that option. Once you get outside it's not so bad, actually, and the city looks and smells and sounds like it's supposed to again, grey and wet, which sounds a lot worse than it actually is.
It's great running weather, and how many times have I said I'll start running again? Enough. I'll tell you when I do, and stop talking about it until then.
I've read a couple of Neil Postman books now, speaking of books. I feel so sorry for him. He sounds so disappointed that his ideas haven't been taken and embraced wholesale, and in fact so disappointed and defeated about America in general. The books kind of grow increasingly more hurt...
I've bought myself some halloween candy to eat already. Yay, food!
And my throat is definitely sore. The Juggler coughed, TOW and the SO sniffled, I'm just sore/swollen/tender with no outward display. Pah.
Now, to sleep if I can, other stuff sooner or later than that. Oh! With the rain I'm sleeping through the night again (unless I need to wake up and turn the light off over the Juggler on the couch at 5am because he can't sleep lying down due to the cough. Or find a bedmate who hasn't wandered in to sleep by 4am. But I -do- get back to sleep quickly. Sigh).
This has been a totally random entry. Be well, take care, and good night.
