Dream parade
May. 19th, 2020 08:19 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
greenstormThe night before last I slept very late, I was exhausted, and I had a ton of people come visit me in my dreams. It's far enough along that I don't remember most of who, but definitely G, Kelsey, and Heather from work along with a couple others. In many but not all cases there was a definite "Greenie, we like you but we aren't going to spend much time with you anymore" vibe. Which. These are not folks I spend much time with? But I guess my brain was just wrapping that up.
Then last night, same deal. Tired, hard to wake up, and I had a pretty extended dream about hanging out with Adrian E.
I don't normally remember my dreams. I don't normally have visitations by people who actually exist. Normally I slip into alternate worlds, alternate lifetimes, and live them out until I wake up.
I guess "people" are alternative worlds and lifetimes nowadays. Threshold is the real world, from which I semi-grudgingly leave to go to work briefly.
Staying home so much is clarifying for me that, well, I like being here. Travelling to the coast a couple times a year was a holdover from my move: I felt like I could leave the city and keep those relationships intact. Now I know I'd rather host the folks who are willing and able to come up.
The thing is, because Threshold is such an extension of me, I can't be in any other place as my full self. I'm always leaving a huge chunk of myself elsewhere. Up here, when I see someone, they can see me instead of just a shadow, instead of the portable parts only.
So. Maybe for a lot of people that realization is a bit of a parting.
Then last night, same deal. Tired, hard to wake up, and I had a pretty extended dream about hanging out with Adrian E.
I don't normally remember my dreams. I don't normally have visitations by people who actually exist. Normally I slip into alternate worlds, alternate lifetimes, and live them out until I wake up.
I guess "people" are alternative worlds and lifetimes nowadays. Threshold is the real world, from which I semi-grudgingly leave to go to work briefly.
Staying home so much is clarifying for me that, well, I like being here. Travelling to the coast a couple times a year was a holdover from my move: I felt like I could leave the city and keep those relationships intact. Now I know I'd rather host the folks who are willing and able to come up.
The thing is, because Threshold is such an extension of me, I can't be in any other place as my full self. I'm always leaving a huge chunk of myself elsewhere. Up here, when I see someone, they can see me instead of just a shadow, instead of the portable parts only.
So. Maybe for a lot of people that realization is a bit of a parting.
