Awake.

[greenstorm]

I went running last night, and it was a very good thing to do. I feel all-the-way awake today, with no sleepy bit in the afternoon. I'm glad. I'm glad Bob is learning to manipulate me into running, too-- "it's good for you" doesn't work but "I need to go running and I need some help with motivation" does. I'm hoping that, this summer, I'll be able to play with my own motivational dynamics a bit. I have a lot of trouble doing things for myself sometimes, just *doing* them, but I can pretty much always manage something for someone else (my recent boundary work has been around saying 'no' when other people ask me for things, and that's pretty good now, so it's time to mess with the other end). When I'm in a really bad way, getting up to fix myself a bowl of cereal is a problem, but I can cook dinner and dessert if someone around me mentions that they're hungry.

It's all tied in to the midwestern female duty/guilt complex, eeeww.

Things are getting done here- huse cleaned, rat food put in bins, things packed, lists made, webpage beginning. It's good to be productive. It's interesting to think that this is the last time I'm seeing my accounts at work. I think it makes me work harder, or feel less beat-down, or at least less stuck-in-a-rut.

The sunshine today was absolutely ridiculously wonderful. I met Bob for lunch and curled up with him in Robson square, which is the best thing ever to do.