Quality of Life

[greenstorm]

There's a very distinctly different qualitative difference in the feel of my life when I'm sleeping 8 hours a night, eating enough, and getting hours to myself here and there.

I have the ability to sit still, to appreciate things more deeply (though not as intensely), to make more useful choices that perpetuate whichever state I'm in (unpack the house rather than gallivant around, for example), and to take the world as it comes. I am not distracted all the time. I do more hedonistic things, and less social things (some of my hobbies, like sex, span both these states nicely).

Last night I fell asleep before ten. Today: short workday, house getting slowly organized, lunch with a dear friend, finally got in touch with mom. Still to do: plan potluck stuff for tomorrow, more tidying and cleaning, get my butt striped up.

I remember this fluctuation; I've always had it. I used to call it summer Greenie and winter Greenie, because it used to be so seasonal for me. So much difference creeps in- intellectual vs experiential and interpersonal, high energy vs low, internally focused vs external. I said up there it was sleep and self-care that cause it, but who's to know those abilities are not symptoms instead? Perhaps correlated in some other way?

I wish I could manage graceful transitions on this keyboard, but I can't. All I can manage is the gist of a thought. Next one up, as I sort my clothes into dressers: I have a lot of cool clothing! More skirts than pants by both volume and number, enough that I may need a second skirt drawer, and likewise dresses. I'm looking forward to wearing things to things in the next little while, though the best will be saved for after the masquerade.

Well, there's my break. Back to making my home a house.