When it rains

[greenstorm]

It occurred to me a day or two ago that soon we'll get the first rain of the season. Last night it snowed lightly. March is our driest month up here. But someday we will get snow.

Everyone is bored in quarantine and messaging me. It would be great if 1) I wasn't running around being a stressbucket for work and had time to talk 2) I had a stable routine going on and had inclination to talk 3) I didn't feel like a combination free apocalypse insurance and entertainment option and 4) These folks hadn't previously indicated that for various reasons folks shouldn't live rurally (first nations, bad for the environment) and 5) I thought that if folks came up they would bring what food they could, do what work they could, and be careful about bringing up potential virus (self-quarantine for 10 days previous or whatever) and know that with more than one person in it my house is smaller than their apartment.

Ugh. I'm in a terrible mood lately. Working on this flight tomorrow is keeping me from stabilizing; I need to get my hard labour in somehow. The roads are mostly snowfree enough to run on so I may end up going to that again.

And... buried in here, Tucker needs to move back to Vancouver. We're talking about ways to still be together some, but it won't ever be as close to full time as it has been, I think. The virus has slowed things down in that regard; the stuff he needs from the city is less available right now. But.

I'll write more about that later, I'm still processing, but it's rough times. I love him and the combination of autonomy and domesticity we'd got going on.

So, for those chalking up events on the psych stress list at home: in the last 4 months we've had a job change, 2 major relationship changes, significant financial status changes, and a pandemic. Not to mention a pretty big change in activity levels.

After the flight my plan is to take some days half-to-off work and focus on building a solid WFH routine which includes things like food and running. Hopefully that will give me a foundation to get through the rest of the year.

Comments

[yarrowkat]

items 1-3 i am 100% in the same bucket as you. my phone is blowing *up*, and it's a mix of good friends and people i deliberately lost touch with and i feel i must respond to the good friends (i'm ignoring the others because wtf; a pandemic does not mean i lower my standards for quality humans). and i have so dang much going on, so much more than usual, that i don't have time, or enough cope, for any of it.

i hope you get some moisture soon. and a routine. <3

[greenstorm]

Your desert is showing; we had roughly 105% snowpack this year and most of it is still out there melting by the day; there is no shortage of moisture. Rain is just... nice, such a lovely sign of spring to have liquid from the sky.

I wish I was on a bigger space these days. The neighbours feel too close. I consider closing out social media for a week or two fairly often.

[yarrowkat]

ha, i guess so! you sounded like you wanted some rain so - i wish for you the things that you want! :)

how much land do you have? doing a multiweek social media detox is really awesome, honestly. i have only managed it myself very occasionally but everytime i do, i wonder why i don't just live my whole life like that. and then i get to missing it and turn it back on again.

[greenstorm]

7 acres in a strip 250' wide. I covet my next-door 7 acres, which would put my house in the middle with a buffer to either side (it's right up against the neighbouring lot). But the house is also right close to the road in front.

I have very little in-person social circle. I suppose I could just turn off facebook and text/IM everyone a lot, which to be honest is something I've enjoyed from time to time. I'd probably miss news of a lockdown in that case though.

[graydon2]

About everyone I've ever known is "checking in with me" which is surprisingly exhausting for introvert boy yes.

Sorry about the other pieces. That's a hard list. <3

[greenstorm]

Hopefully they're not offering to invade, at least.

[graydon2]

Thankfully not.

[greenstorm]

Small blessings