There are similarities, of the kind as you will find between most breakups. However, even in the face of these alluring parallels, don't forget the contextual differences between our relationship, and yours with Kynnin: ours was never a common relationship, in the "everyday" sense of the word. In all the time we shared, wonderful as it was, there were no ordinary days; and indeed the entire time we had together was -- I'm purposefully marginalizing the online times -- concentrated on the one-and-a-half months I could spare out of the break between terms, making it in a sense a "holiday relationship".
With that came strains that would have hardly figured in had it not been the Long-Distance Relationship it was, of which the financial one was clearly the weightiest (though also, I have to admit, the one most easily pushed aside -- what is money compared to love, after all?). Even had we not ended the relationship as we did, we (and first and foremost I) would have come to acknowledge the physical limitations inherent in our situation: I simply would have run out of the means to continue seeing you as I did then.
So, I don't think it is exactly the same to any degree beyond the simple parallel of the breakup as such; the context is just too different. I think the end of our relationship was probably less hurtful than it seemed to me then, for the simple reason that we were estranged at the time we parted ways. Trite as it is, I have come to think that it was probably better to have ended then (though it hurt, and quite a lot -- but these things do, and have to), rather than have it go out with a bang and a nasty realization of being unable to continue not for lack of feelings, but for an outer influence as mundane as money.
I'm actually talking about a different situation now, with Chris and Mouse. I haven't been able to state it too well on livejournal right now because, well, I can't. It'll come someday.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2004-07-20 04:26 pm (UTC)With that came strains that would have hardly figured in had it not been the Long-Distance Relationship it was, of which the financial one was clearly the weightiest (though also, I have to admit, the one most easily pushed aside -- what is money compared to love, after all?). Even had we not ended the relationship as we did, we (and first and foremost I) would have come to acknowledge the physical limitations inherent in our situation: I simply would have run out of the means to continue seeing you as I did then.
So, I don't think it is exactly the same to any degree beyond the simple parallel of the breakup as such; the context is just too different. I think the end of our relationship was probably less hurtful than it seemed to me then, for the simple reason that we were estranged at the time we parted ways. Trite as it is, I have come to think that it was probably better to have ended then (though it hurt, and quite a lot -- but these things do, and have to), rather than have it go out with a bang and a nasty realization of being unable to continue not for lack of feelings, but for an outer influence as mundane as money.
no subject
Date: 2004-07-20 04:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-07-21 03:30 am (UTC)